Sunday, March 12, 2006

Rainy Day Musings

My son is sleeping and its rainy. What better time to do nothing? Okay posting is not nothing. It is a way to free myself from some of the things floating around in my mind. Do you ever feel like there are so many things in there that you may never get to see them all? I used to release this pent up feeling of things exploding in my brain by writing, but now I don't have the time. I have so many things going on, so many things to do, and these things pile more stuff into my brain, it's a wonder I haven't cracked up. If you ever see a woman with a blank stare walking down the street it could be -- after the crack up. After everything has exploded out of my mind into the fog around us. Maybe that's why it was so foggy yesterday -- a fog of thoughts and feelings released into the atmosphere. A built up pressure of too much stuff that is finally able to see the light of day, only to dissipate once the sun shines through it. Some thoughts are like that -- once you bring them out in the light of day, once practicality and common sense chime in, they evaporate like the remnants of a dream. Then some day in the far future you read about, or hear about, or see your thought brought to the light again by some other, more persistent visionary, and you think, boy that seems familiar, didn't I ..., but no life is to busy for you to remember those half thoughts. People who lives are slower, more in tune with themselves and everything around them, can go around and spool up all those loose memories. They pull together an unknown and unwitting collaboration of the world's thought detritus and make it into something that no one could conceive.

Saturday, March 04, 2006

Futility At Work

Why does it seem like I can never get anything done? I sit down at my desk and find ways to waste time. I would think with my now limited amount of time to do things that I would be a little better at getting things done when I have the chance. As you can see I am now writing here instead of a list of things a mile long I should be doing. I have good intentions, but then I get caught up in something else. At least I haven't resorted to Spider Solitare yet. I usually only get there when I'm just on the Internet and waiting forever for pages to load, or when I'm really procrastinating. I have piles of stuff I need to go through. More piles of studd I need to file. Tax stuff to do. Bills to pay. Argh! Just thinking of it is making me want to crack out the solitare game. It also happens to be nice and sunny, if a bit chilly outside. But my son is sleeping, so I should take advantage of this time to get things done that I can't do when he's around. He likes to mess up the piles I have on the floor. Sometimes he will wander off with something, and I'll find a printer cable or the stamp dispenser in the living room. If you can't tell from the picture, I also was feeling ambitious while out shopping yesterday and decided to try my hand at scrapbooking. We'll see how that goes. Okay, now I'm really going to get something done.